Monday, May 31, 2010
Long (Island) Weekend
We spent the long weekend on Long Island, playing in the pool and on the beaches. Every time I felt a little something, I talked myself down from escalating anxiety, took four slow deep breaths, and reminded myself that relaxing actually was productive. Aside from stopping the suspect med, I wasn't sure how to wait out its exit from my system.
Both stress and too much exposure to sunlight are known to exacerbate lupus in some people. As someone who was called Snow White as a child, I've always been careful about the sun, but I became slightly obsessive about sun protection once I learned of the lupus connection. I've never noticed a connection between sun exposure and lupus activity in my body, though, but I am positive about the powerful calm I get from being in the water and at the beach. I decided it was worth it to do the weekend water baby style- just slathered in sun screen and under a hat.
Friday afternoon, I swam some easy laps in the pool, and laughed a lot. As the afternoon cooled off, I threw on running clothes and jogged very easily for half an hour, the limit I had set for myself upon starting out. It felt a bit stiff at first, but better after 20 minutes or so. It's a throw away workout of a throw away training week, but it was terrific emotionally.
Saturday was a full beach day spent running back and forth between the towel and the ice bucket of an ocean. I couldn't help myself from running down into the ocean or back out, squealing. I felt so exhilarated to be doing little sprints for fun without ankle pain in the sand. Collapsing on the warm blanket, my relief far surpassed escaping the frigid water. Lying on my back, hearing my people laughing, and breathing in the straw hat warmed in the sun over my face, I wondered where I would be now had the last decade gone differently.
Had things not lined up well for me, would I have been at the right place at the right time to make everything that makes me happy now happen? These are the people that I've realized will be here and making me happy no matter how things line up now. It's something I've never wanted to test, so I deeply appreciate the emphatic, reassuring words I've been hit over the head with.
That question also makes me feel like I have to be fine; finer tomorrow than I am today, and taking this all for granted again in a week or two from now.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Warehoused
Monday, May 24, 2010
Short and Speedy
10 minutes running, 10 minutes of racing up stairs, and 10 more flat minutes to finish it off. It's the coolest it's been in quite a while, but I was dripping sweat half way through the stairs.
I'm trying to build in a bit of speed and hill work, but haven't a clue what I'm doing or how to incorporate these kinds of training intelligently when a marathon is the ultimate goal. I'll have to read up on what Galloway says.
I exerted myself enough, though, that as I ran, beet red, the last few blocks to my apartment, a man on a stoop wearing a Jamaican flag hat nodded and said "good for you."
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Sugar at the End of the Tunnel
The bridle trail is the best dirt. There's the reservoir loop and winding, weaving in and out of the shade of the trees. The bottom half of it is usually fairly empty- probably because it doesn't lead anywhere (meaning: in, out, or to a pond or meadow). It's quiet and peaceful, and feels like it's for runners.
I like the tunnels, too, the underneaths of the foot bridges. They're darker than they seem like they should be, given the openness on each end, and cool. They smell like earth and, running through, the dampness gives me goosebumps on my arms. It should be a little creepy, but it isn't. Entering from the bright sunshine yesterday morning, sun spots blocked my ability to see the dark ground in front of me, which was almost disorienting. It's happened before in the tunnels, and I have to shift my gaze from the ground about ten feet ahead of me to the horizon. Otherwise, I misstep the way I do when I think there's one stair more than there actually is at the bottom of a flight.
Soon after the tunnel at the bottom of the bridle trail, I caught up with the man I had tried to set my pace to in the beginning. He was wearing a tshirt from a race, and as I caught up, I could finally read the sponsor's name on the back, Entenmann's. As in donuts. Chutzpah in sponsorship. Go figure.
As much as I looove Entenmann's chocolate glazed cake donuts, I stuck to something lighter. I snacked on fruit leather and Gatorade during the actual (80 minute) run because my stomach needs some practice digesting and running at the same time. So far, so good on that front. I've been able to avoid the side cramps by ingesting a bit at a time during the one minute of ten that I walk. I think the constant little stream of sugar and water keeps my energy level more stable. The fruit leather is not so easy to eat though, so I'm moving on to fruit snacks.
All in all, I felt good and rather proud of myself. That is, until an email from my father telling me he had a nice 12 (12!) mile run. Still works for me though-- discipline goes well with a side of luck, and I'll take those genes.
Friday, May 21, 2010
I'll Do (Almost) Anything for a T-Shirt
Does anyone want to run one of these with me? Keep in mind that although I've bitten off a lot with this whole marathon thing, I'm sloooow and have no desire to 'race' these. I just want to get a little experience at racing events, and these look like a fun way to get my weekend runs in! Of course, I'm also hoping for some event t-shirts.
This one celebrates Japanese culture and is only four miles. They must throw in some gyoza, right? right?:
http://www.nyrr.org/races/2010/r0606x00.asp
This one's longer (a 10k), but looks like a very cool women's race. A pregnant Paula Radcliffe and Kara Goucher are the special guests (and will be running, but not racing). http://www.nyrr.org/races/2010/mini/story1.asp
Both courses go through and around the park. Want to play with me? Please.... I'll talk your ear off and the time will fly. Promise.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Hit and Run
Straight up now tell me
Do you really want to love me forever oh oh oh
Or am I caught in a hit and run
Straight up now tell me
Is it gonna be you and me together oh oh oh
Are you just having fun
Brilliant choreography. We pointed up for the 'straight up,' pointed to ourselves for the 'me,' and shook our straight pint sized hips with attitude for the belted 'oh oh oh'. I don't remember ever sharing this production with anyone not participating in it. I do remember feeling energized by it, and some exaggerated huffing and puffing as we collapsed on the carpeted classroom floor at the end.
This is when I'm happiest; when I'm active without realizing it, because I'm on my way somewhere or I'm playing or I'm thinking. It's my 20 minute walk to work each morning and evening. A little window for people watching, and time to myself or to catch up with a call to my mom. It's a bike ride on a pretty day when it's more about the food you're going to pick up on the way than getting a workout.
It's also how I feel when I'm running, get lost in a song or a thought, forget to turn off the dirt path, and end up on a second reservoir loop. Another full hour morning run :)
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Giving in to (Diet) Coke Addiction
For today though, the trick is not to let the missed workout bother me and push me slowly off the do-everything-healthy wagon. I've stuck to the healthy eating, but in the battle of Kate versus the delicious, addictive toxins that can cause migraines, the score is Kate-0, Diet Coke-1. Cross your fingers for your stupid, weak friend.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Caaaabs (as they say in Boston)
We stopped at a running store and I (read: parents) bought Sports Beans to try out as pre or during run boost. They're made by Jelly Belly and appear to be regular jelly beans, just bigger and with electrolytes and vitamins. I accidentally left them in my purse, which I took to work this morning, and have been snacking on a pack all morning.
I've also been experimenting with real food. I've been on a cooking kick and have gotten into finding new healthy recipes featuring whole grains. Since I don't eat meat and have been living soy-free for a year, filling myself with nutritious satisfying food is a challenge. Running is also a nice excuse and a good reason to explore the world of carbs.
I'm loving quinoa. My current favorite lunch/dinner/snack is a caprese quinoa salad of red quinoa (cooked and chilled), chopped fresh basil, cherry tomatoes, and little cubes or balls of fresh mozzarella. I drizzle olive oil and add salt and pepper.
Quinoa is a complete protein, a good source of magnesium (which in addition to being important for muscles and blood vessels, is good for warding off migraines), and is a great source of fiber. Plus it cooks in 15 minutes!
I also made granola last night, which turned out a little too sweet, but is very satisfying as cereal or a Greek yogurt topping. You just mix all dry ingredients together in one bowl and all wet ingredients in another. Then pour the wet over the dry, stir it up, and place on a baking sheet for an hour and ten minutes in a 300 degree oven, stirring up every 20 minutes. It becomes crispier as it cools and stores in a zip lock. I'm planning to play with the mix of things a bit, but this is a good base.
dry:
4 cups of oats
3/4 cup or each: flax meal, wheat germ
1/2 cup of each: chopped pecans, sliced almonds
one teaspoon of each: salt, cinnamon
wet:
1/4-1/3 cup canola oil
1/4 cup honey
1 1/2 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup of water
Looking forward to getting my own (smaller) GPS watch, a couple good runs this week, and more carbs than Lindsay Lohan has consumed in the last decade.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Why Treatment Isn't Good Enough
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/11/health/11case.html
This from a NYT column I just stumbled upon as I wait for an end of the day meeting. The way Berlin writes about forgetting and remembering the weight of living with an autoimmune disease is perfect. It's why treatment is not enough.
Brain
Feeling detached from your body is also a strategy. Telling myself that I was not my body, I was not the legs that wanted to stop moving forward or the arms that hurt to reach, was how I stuck with the internal monologue 'I'm going to get through this. Somehow this has to end and I have to be fine.' There was pain and then there was me, sitting up in my brain and trying not to internalize and identify with the sensations, channeling Brain from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I have to think that staying in your head is a fairly common pain management technique. It's a strategy, and it can be effective, but I think it takes time and work after the pain to become healthy again.
Running is something that has helped me to get back the feeling of connectedness with my body. Even slowly and fairly unathletically, one cannot run without engaging an overwhelming majority of body parts. I was thinking about all of this this morning as I hit the 40 minute mark of my (one hour) run. I was feeling really loose and my muscles all felt aerated. I remember feeling this feeling every time I've ever really stuck to a serious exercise program. It's a nice reminder that our parts are all there for a reason, and that bodies were made to move, and to accomplish.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Today is World Lupus Day!
A: [From http://www.lupusny.org/lupus.php:] Systemic lupus erythematosus (S.L.E.), commonly called lupus, is a chronic autoimmune disorder that can affect virtually any organ of the body. In lupus, the body's immune system, which normally functions to protect against foreign invaders, becomes hyperactive, forming antibodies that attack normal tissues and organs, including the skin, joints, kidneys, brain, heart, lungs, and blood. Lupus is characterized by periods of illness, called flares, and periods of wellness, or remission.
Lupus is unpredictable, highly individualized, hard to live with—and sometimes fatal. To date, there is no known cause or cure. However, early detection and treatment can usually lessen the progression and severity of the debilitating disease.
Anti-inflammatory drugs, anti-malarials, and steroids (such as cortisone and others) are often used to treat lupus. Cytotoxic chemotherapies, similar to those used in the treatment of cancer, are also used to suppress the immune system in lupus patients.
Ninety percent of lupus victims are women, and the onset of the disease usually occurs between the ages of l5 and 44. Lupus is also a leading cause of kidney disease, stroke, and premature cardiovascular disease in women of childbearing age. Unfortunately, statistics predict that 5 percent of children born to lupus-diagnosed mothers will eventually develop the disease themselves.
[Coincidentally, the amount pledged broke $1,000 today!]
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Clockwise
I know that reasoning holds up on a track, but I may be extending it to satisfy a touch of OCD. Plus, I enjoy reading everyone's tshirts and exchanging a smile or a look that, at least in my head, acknowledges a common understanding of the suckiness that is part two of the hill at the northwest corner of the park that's hidden behind the tricky curve by the pool. On the suckiness scale though, running that hill ranks significantly better than biking it, which rocks. It feels like one for the little guy-- or at least one for the wheel-less guy.
The 6 mile loop took me almost 80 minutes again, and I'm pretty unimpressed by my pace. I'm telling myself the right things, that it's just the time to be getting into running shape and building a bit of endurance, and that speed doesn't matter. It's just that I want to be able to feel and mark my progress. What I really need is to buy a GPS watch so that I can focus on building mileage as I weave through the little dirt trails. Or perhaps someone can buy me a chart with gold stars. Kidding..... mostly.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Stairs
I really have enjoyed Jeff Galloway's book, Marathon, which my Dad had sent to my office the week I committed to this. Galloway's central point is that anyone can run a marathon, the training doesn't have to take over your life, and the key is to focus on endurance over speed and goal times and protecting yourself from injury. He's also got some hepful tips on mind games to play while running, motivation, and nutrition for training. I have no results to show for it, but if you're looking for an encouraging and unintimidating marathon guide, I highly recommend it!
Gallaway is a big proponent of walking breaks. Apparently, it's common (even among serious athletes and marathon winners) both in training and in the actual race to walk one minute out of every 6-10ish minutes of running. The switch between muscle groups helps keep the running muscles stay fresher longer. The important thing to remember is to start incorporating the walking breaks from the beginning, BEFORE you need them. As it's also supposed to help with injury avoidance, I've decided to walk one minute out of every ten on my runs. It doesn't seem to make the running much easier (though I really don't feel like I'm pushing myself with running yet or need the breaks), but the walking does feel like it's helping stretch out my legs as they warm up.
And just because I brought the camera phone today, a shot of one of my favorite stretches. Some of my favorite spots in the park are popular favorite spots, so I appreciate hitting them at such quiet times.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
"Long" Run
Both Saturday's and this morning's runs were quite warm and muggy. I see now that the alternative after-work running time is not very practical, but I'm enjoying the early morning light, air, and productivity.